hello all, i’m breaking my long social media hiatus to tell people about an album i’ve been working on for the last little while that’s out today. 12 short rock and roll songs about various worries. listen to it here and reblog this around if you like it please. I’ll probably repost this in a week or so when I put it out on spotify and other streaming as well. thanks for listening.
https://blankritual.bandcamp.com/album/today-today-today-today-today
Because of covid, now when I’m at the gym I feel like a sumo wrestler, for two reasons:
1. I have to carry a spray bottle of cleaning solution and a cloth, and wipe down every piece of equipment after I use it, almost like the wrestlers sanctifying the ring between matches
2. I’m very fat
A friend of mine is starting a business for “queer tutoring” which isn’t like, a tutor who is queer, they’re trying to tutor people about queer issues and….. I don’t know how to tell them how bad of an idea that is. They have literally zero social work experience. They’re just kind of an armchair activist, and they want to make this their full time job….
Some business advice, it should be queer coaching and targeted at companies rather than individuals, with some kind of made up credential like Queer Council Recognised Gold Badge. Get a nice printer for the certificates and badges. Get a nice website. Become a vessel for pink washing and watch the dollars fly in
Anonymous asked:
Imagine an elf is given a job to do at a human institution. The humans think elves don’t need bathroom breaks, since they know they can hold it for days, but this elf has been traveling to reach their job, and has already been holding it to the point they are in pain. They ask for a break, but their job is important and time sensitive, so they admit they can still hold it when asked. After a full day of work, the elf tries to reach the bathroom in time, but they were never told where it is.
and the saddest part of all? the job is to manufacture bathroom furnishing and supplies. This little elf that’s bursting for a piss is surrounded by toilets
Jesus Christ of Nazareth was the ultimate punk
PIGMAN
Lost the whole start of the last post, oh well. It was just about a thought. Who cares
“No, it’s not” ok thought not, please continue
Wish I was at home, blazing and watching Horace and Pete again
I think I’ll advertise my premium porn streaming service using the Stranger Things font
does anyone else find themselves in their late 20s with no ability to control going absolutely crazy?
Instead of going crazy, I put that energy into thinking about elaborate conspiracy theories involving the Turkish business owners in my neighborhood
page 481 - here we see the village in happier times, its waterfront a place of bustle and commerce, its sky a place of ships made of clouds. Whether they were a mass hallucination or actual ships made of actual clouds, no one is sure
To all my followers, me and my brother will be livestreaming the grand opening of a local supermarket tomorrow at 6:45am UK time, which is 2:45am East Coast
be there you bastards, what else are you going to be doing?
Here is the link: https://www.instagram.com/realsimondavid/
(via realisenothing)
